If ever there is a time of year to come up with crazy drinks and thematic brews, now is the time. And none to soon, as Halloween tricks and treats are just around the dimly lit, spider infested, witch crouching corner.

As gin so infrequently grabs my attention, I thought now is as good a time as any, to give it its hypnotic due.

This drink resonates with a cucumber gin gimlet, though with a few slices of a knife, and the aid of some simple syrup, it quickly takes on a new personality.

Add as many or as few little floating maggots (finely diced cucumber, no peel) as you desire, and feel free to thicken the liquid itself with gooey piles of cucumber pulp—for stomach churning effect.

Maggotini
serves 1.

2 oz Gin
4 oz Tonic
Splash soda
1 oz fresh lime juice
1 oz cucumber juice
1 tsp simple syrup (OR blue agave sweetener, see note)

Peel cucumber, halve and scoop out seeds/pulp (with small spoon). Press pulp in mesh strainer for ‘cucumber juice.’ Finely dice cucumber and add to drink. Stir to blend (or use shaker) gin, tonic, lime and cucumber juices and simple syrup. Splash with soda—flash a wicked smile—and serve.

Note: click here to learn how to make simple syrup. I just used blue agave sweetener; it is quite trendy and perfect for storing and using in iced coffees and cocktails when you need a liquid sugar.

Need more Halloween inspired drinks? Here are some drinks from Halloween past:

• Black Widow
• Liquefied Ghost
• Bootini
• Mummy Juice
• Purple People Eater

It is good. It is thick, no doubt, but good.

Ruhlman has earned his keep as a culinary journalist, having focused his interest on the plight of chefs, he has made his mark. WHAT makes a chef? What is the motivation, the measure, the conjecture? WHY be a chef?  WHO has earned that name, HOW do you achieve mastery of chef-ness? These burning questions follow Ruhlman, make him pause, push him.

This book is divided into thirds. There are three separate chefs or experiences to follow, three different angles to address these questions. I don’t believe it was his goal to marry these three parts; they stand alone in their story and journalistic research of individual paths to chef-dom. You the reader may make conclusions, can nod your head individually or consummately for each part.

The first part follows the Certified Master Chef Exam. Ten grueling days of tests; perhaps meant to break you. Stress is thicker than roux and adds glutenous tension to tyrannically rated tests. One must possess infinite and often obscure bits of culinary knowledge, cooking precision above all others, perfect skills and timed trials. The percentage of chefs passing their first attempt, is minuscule. Only certain personalities and a marriage to perfection, will prevail. And some do. And they earn culinary honor, boosted resumes and the knowledge that according to this test, they are the best of the best. Some souls require—and are inspired—by that proof.

Others do not.

The second slice of the book follows a very successful chef, who went to culinary school, graduated and then mapped his own path. Michael Symon is unconventional, not following specific rules. He is colloquial in his approach, gregarious in form and a top-notch chef. But he does not succumb to uptight rules or emulating any chef before him; he would not consider taking The Exam. For him, it is about good food—which isn’t necessarily synonymous with precision food. He cooks from his soul, and his soul is his own, different than the next. Sleeves rolled high, the soul of this chef oozes right down his arms and into his hands, and ultimately into his food.

The third part fills in a different wedge. It is about a chef whose soul is disciplined and knowledgable, with very high, self applied standards. No culinary school, no Certified Master Chef Exam; Thomas Keller (French Laundry) is considered one of the best chefs in the country. Self-motivated, self-taught, insatiably curious; his culinary soul may be synonomous with Beethoven’s comprehension of the piano. He has a gift, one he trained and pushed and easily maintains. This slice of the book follows him, studies him and adores him. And why shouldn’t it?

Ruhlman has made a mark in food writing, one that includes hard questions and thick answers, one that causes us to question and think and try to comprehend the role of, the call to and the very soul of a chef.

If ever you had a spoon, and could insert it into the computer screen with optimal effect: this would be the time. If you like mushroom soup, you should try this one. If you aim to embrace fall’s earthy flavors and welcome the changing season with seasonal menus, look no further.

I have been making this mushroom soup for years. I often serve it to guests. And now that summer’s lemonade is drained and strawberry shortcake is a fading memory… we best be embracing this rapidly arriving season with mushroom-inspired, liquor-reduced, cinnamon-laced, nut-filled, nutmeg/cinnamon/pumpkin/sweet potato flavored menus. Bake me apples, fill my pots with roast, thicken the stews: fall is upon us!

This soup is more than ample. And presents nuttiness and deep, complex flavors to nourish souls; it hugs the ground and lends memory to satisfying famished friends and hungered bellies over the course of history. I can hardly imagine a Thanksgiving meal—or simple fall lunch—that would turn this down. Harsh conditions of weather and economy may be upon us, but so is good food, solid food, nourishing and economical. Share spoons and may good spirits prevail.

Sherried Brie Mushroom soup

1.5 cups dry sherry
1 T butter
10 oz mushrooms, sliced
1/3 cup shallots (can sub some red onion)
1 T lemon juice (optional)
2 T flour
2 cups beef stock
1 1/2 cups Brie cheese, trimmed and cubed
1 cup half & half
1/2 tsp pepper

Boil sherry to reduce by half; set aside. In large saucepan melt butter, stir in shrooms, shallots and lemon juice. Cook over medium high heat, 4 minutes. Stir occasionally. Stir in flour, add stock and sherry. Bring to boil then simmer 15 mintues. Add brie, stir to melt. Add 1/2 and 1/2 and pepper. Simmer 5 more minutes. Remove from heat, puree in batches (OR employ your favorite tool and mine: the immersion blender), and serve.

Now THIS is what I call culinary school.

Really, it should involve palate education. And not just eat what you cook, and cook what you eat. I mean, roll up your sleeves, close your eyes and chew. Take off the labels, inhale the aromas, chew chew chew.

I am in a class right now that is all about product variances. Think of it as ingredients 101, learning about what is available on the market, making educated decisions about food orders, comprehending food costs. One important factor is familiarity. Knowing one pear from the next, different brands of apples, developing an opinion on the vast complexities and differences among olive oils. One should be familiar with herbs and spices, have an opinion about piles upon piles of cheese and be schooled in all cuts of poultry and meat.

To myself, I think, this is going to take a lifetime. And I aim to enjoy, deliberately, the motion of my jaw going up and down, and the flavors swirling around all edges of my mouth for the duration. I will press my eyes shut and concentrate on flavors, settling into their layers. I will form my opinions, and my palate will have its say.

And folks, you don’ t need to go to culinary school to do the same.

Tonight’s class, for example, we discussed fresh produce. Now, there is a lot to know about produce that is very specific for running and opening a restaurant (consider yourself lucky you if you are not: no need to worry about yields and margins and edible portion and computing how many bunches of parsley you have to order, or how many portions come from from 30 cups of chopped tomatoes, without the seeds or skins). You don’t need to figure out how many pears in a box and if you want each one individually wrapped, or what grade of tomatoes you need for salad garnishing versus tomato concasse. Instead, your focus on produce is between you and your kitchen—it is about becoming intimate with your ingredients. Then you will be armed like the best of them.

Restaurant opening aside, familiarity with produce starts in your mouth. Think wine tasting applied to [insert food to for tasting here].  For my last class this meant apples a pears. Go buy 5 different varieties. Write down their names, slice them all at once and compare. Take each one in, aroma, flavor, size; then write down their names, and take notes. Put a party around it, or don’t. Have a pear party (oh, and make a cocktail with pear brandy, it is lovely) or an apple party, or simply offer a special tasting to your family as a memorable diversion. Chances are, they will enjoy it.

For class we taste-tested:

Apples
Honeycrisp
Aurora
Fuji
Golden Delicious
Roma

Pears
Bosc
Bartlett
Red Bartlett
D ‘Anjou

Think color, texture, mealy, tart, sweet, crisp, mature, mellow… add on your own… notes of honey, hints of citrus… tastes overripe. Nasty like smelly socks. Reminds me of smoky cheddar cheese. You get the idea. For fun, I ranked them in order of preference (My favorite apple was honey crisp and my favorite pears were Bosc and Red Bartlett). You be the judge; its your palate.

A final note. The Chef also provide two emails for reference, which you might enjoy:

www.bestapples.com/varities, and

www.uspears.com

Hey mom, why don’t you post on smoothies? My reflex response: because they are so typical in our family I don’t think they count. They couldn’t possibly be interesting to people.

And yet.

We love them and have them almost every day. And they are so easy to make, they evade the rigid parameters of a recipe. Our smoothies are typically enjoyed for breakfast or as part of an after school snack. They judiciously represent the recommended ‘3-5 servings of fruit daily.’ AND are a perfect delivery system for a packet of Emergen-C.

Besides, for those of us who love the ideas of bananas, yet find the banana-ey texture hard to overcome: smoothies are key to banana consumption. And bananas are brilliantly good for you.

The ’sorta’ recipe for SMOOTHIES
serves 2-3.

2 large scoops lemon sorbet
1 banana
1 cup [frozen] mango cubes
1/2 cup [frozen] berries (strawberry, blackberry, blueberry, raspberry…)
Orange Juice to level of contents (play with OJ amounts according to how you like your smoothie: thick or thin)

Place all on blender, puree. Add blackberries on top to photo, if desired.